Why I don’t want you to tell your kids that ‘One thing leads to another.’
Informed consent means yes to the one thing discussed and decided upon.
It is not an implicit agreement to do anything else or to take things further; for example, agreeing to or initiating making out with someone does not mean yes to anything else until consent is revisited.
Young people are often told that “one thing leads to another” when it comes to sex. Then they get into situations where that misguided mantra causes them to believe that if they gave consent for one thing, like oral sex, that means if things progress from there to penetration, well…
“one thing led to another.”
One thing does not lead to another without revisited consent!
Consent also includes the right to revoke your yes at any time. If you consented, but then decide in the middle of an encounter that something is painful, emotionally triggering, or it makes you uncomfortable — even if you initially agreed to participate in it — you have the right to change your yes to a no! This is an important point about consent: You have the right to change your mind. You have the right to say, “Stop now!”
Consent means: Yes, to one thing discussed and decided upon.
Consent does not mean: An implicit agreement to do anything else or to take things further.
Consent includes: The right to revoke your yes at any time.
